//long overdue post it was on my draft for quite awhile so sorry!
Thank you to those who wished me a happy birthday I am so sorry I can't get back to you personally, I've been busy with college and real life. But I appreciate each and everyone of it. Really.
So I have officially reached the last teen year of my life. The last year I'll be saying I'm a teen. I don't know if I am happy to be 19. To be honest, I really am not. People be like, "You're an adult now." "You can watch and do 18+ stuff." Dude what's that supposed to mean? It's just that I can't get over the fact that the first digit of my age will soon increase to 2. I don't want to answer "20" when people ask me how old I am. It makes me feel old. And it's weird. But what can I do. I am afraid. Afraid of aging. Afraid of growing up. Afraid that I have to shoulder so much responsibilities, do so many things in life and think of everything all by my own where I really can't. People said, "As you grow up and age, you'll be much more mature." when right now, I'm not even close to mature. I can't cook, I don't know how to be independent, I always rely on other people, I'm gullible, naive and just plain childish. Age has nothing to do with maturity. But my maturity comes and increases as I live my 19 years through learning and experiencing life. From kindergarten to primary school to high school, college and now university. I realized, I now, can make my own decisions wisely. I can think more positively towards people and today, I see the world in a different perspective than I see yesterday. It's all in a matter of age, time and experience I went through these 19 years. Besides having to stand by my own and experience this world alone, I have lots of people that played the biggest role in my life for me to achieve up to this point today, my family, friends and people I met along the way. Thank you. For existing in my life and making this journey a wonderful one.
Thank you to those who wished me a happy birthday I am so sorry I can't get back to you personally, I've been busy with college and real life. But I appreciate each and everyone of it. Really.
So I have officially reached the last teen year of my life. The last year I'll be saying I'm a teen. I don't know if I am happy to be 19. To be honest, I really am not. People be like, "You're an adult now." "You can watch and do 18+ stuff." Dude what's that supposed to mean? It's just that I can't get over the fact that the first digit of my age will soon increase to 2. I don't want to answer "20" when people ask me how old I am. It makes me feel old. And it's weird. But what can I do. I am afraid. Afraid of aging. Afraid of growing up. Afraid that I have to shoulder so much responsibilities, do so many things in life and think of everything all by my own where I really can't. People said, "As you grow up and age, you'll be much more mature." when right now, I'm not even close to mature. I can't cook, I don't know how to be independent, I always rely on other people, I'm gullible, naive and just plain childish. Age has nothing to do with maturity. But my maturity comes and increases as I live my 19 years through learning and experiencing life. From kindergarten to primary school to high school, college and now university. I realized, I now, can make my own decisions wisely. I can think more positively towards people and today, I see the world in a different perspective than I see yesterday. It's all in a matter of age, time and experience I went through these 19 years. Besides having to stand by my own and experience this world alone, I have lots of people that played the biggest role in my life for me to achieve up to this point today, my family, friends and people I met along the way. Thank you. For existing in my life and making this journey a wonderful one.
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Whisper here, I won't tell