Warning: This will be one hell of a long post I swear.
I have been thinking so much these past few weeks. About everything. But especially my life back at matriculation. Then it strucked me, it's almost one year that I've left KMPk. It was one year ago guys. One year ago, on this exact date, we were struggling for our last paper, and I remembered it was Physics. At that time I swear, I can't even think of the exam anymore. All I think was that, today would be the last day I'm gonna see the faces I've seen for the past 10 months. And the thought that hurt the most was that, will I ever see them again?
I know there's some people who have been saying things behind my back like, "Dia ni tak reti nak move on ke apa asyik-asyik matrik. Dah masuk uni pun nak matrik lagi." or "Pehal kau suka sangat throwback? Dah dah la tu." or maybe "Eleh dia bukan rindu sangat matrik tu. Rindu crush dia kat sana je." OK THIS ONE DESERVES A SLAP IN THE FACE. And I will gladly answer those questions for you.
1) "Dia ni tak reti nak move on ke apa asyik-asyik matrik. Dah masuk uni pun nak matrik lagi."
Yes, aku memang tak reti nak move on. No matter how much I want to forget about my days back in matrics and just go on with my life here in USM, the thought of missing KMPk always comes back. Always. Can't you see how big of an impact it has left in my life? Even school doesn't have that kind of impact. Speaking of, I also have some of my friends at school who said to me, "Matrik matrik matrik. Sekolah 5 tahun tak rindu ke?" I swear to god these kind of people get on my nerves. Kau tak experience what I've been through kau diam! People will never understand.
But, that got me into thinking, do I really love matrics that much because of the fact that it was my first time away from home? The first time I lived with other people which soon becomes family? I have never stayed in a hostel before. Maybe that's why. So I went asking several people which phase in life has impacted them the most. Mostly akan jawab pre-uni, matrics, asasi, etc. There! You see? It's not just me. I'm glad it's not just me.
2) "Pehal kau suka sangat throwback? Dah dah la tu."
At most times, I realized that I tend to stroll down memory lane when I'm stressed out. But if it were for KMPk, seems like I'm always stressed out. If you followed me on Instagram, I recently spammed my feed with lots of throwback pictures from my KMPk days. I know, you guys are annoyed. Even I am annoyed with myself. It's as if I macam syok sendiri. You get me? That got me into thinking, "Aku sorang je ke yang syok sendiri ni dok rindu rindu matrik, rindu kawan2 kat matrik. Entah-entah diorang tak pun hah." Idk I have lots of negative thoughts lately but then I shook them off, I can do whatever I want to do with my account. Hah. But really though, it seems like when I throwback a lot, it kinda gives me good vibes on my daily life. It got me a whole lot better, my stress level decreased.
3) "Eleh dia bukan rindu sangat matrik tu. Rindu crush dia kat sana je."
Okay first off, let me slap you in the face first. **SLAP**
Second off, yes, I do have a crush and I do miss him, in fact, I miss everyone and everything in KMPK. I miss my crazy roommates, I miss classmates especially, I miss my JMM friends, I miss my KMM friends, I miss the people I met there, I miss the lecturers, I miss Pakcik burger hongkong, I miss going to class early everyday dekat LH5, and LH6, I miss going to tutorials, I miss going to mentor mentee classes at night, those ridiculous P-PASS, M-PASS and C-PASS, I miss practising MUET with my classmates, I miss going to the masjid with Ekin every night, I miss burger hongkong, I miss Pakwan's breakfast, I miss Kafe Mama, I miss going to Madam Saliza's ceramah, I miss our outings, I miss cocurricular activities, I miss our fieldtrip to Kg Beng, I miss kolam biawak lol, I miss going to lepak at the UFO, I miss spending time dekat bistro makan ais kacang while waiting for koko, I miss lab experiments, I miss climbing up the stairs to my room in level 3, I miss lepak lepak dekat kerusi batu bawah blok, I miss our movie nights dekat bilik TV, I miss studying at the surau & bilik bacaan during study week, I miss blok Seri Intan, I miss beli makanan dekat Seri Krian, I miss the tangga maut, I miss going to the lecturer's cubicle, I miss Sir Naim and how we used to be afraid of him, I miss Miss Amal and the time when we think we were doomed because she won't talk to us, I miss Sir Lee with his appreciation and love towards us with the excessive sweet emojis on WhatsApp, I miss Sir Am bcs his class was always dabomb, I miss Sir Shakirin's jokes, I miss Sir Soma's class, I miss agama class too it was the best, I miss going to the library during breaks, I miss how active our WhatsApp group used to be, I miss karaoke and singing along with Bia & Syaa, I miss fangirling with Fairuz & Shera, I miss gossiping with Ekin & Bia, I miss going to Hani's room and chill, I miss Ecah and her hilarious jokes, I miss Nurul and her hyperactive-ness, I miss Hanis because she's always there for me (until now), I miss Farah and her sense of humour, I miss Kak Tika and how strong she is, she gave me hope, I miss Wani too though we don't spend much time together, I miss Dayat's adorable smile, I miss Faiz's & Zul's sense of humour, I miss Zal and how kind he is, I miss Ravi for being the best class rep ever, I miss Syamir and his sarcastic jokes, I miss Zakri too, eventhough he's only in KMPk for half the sem, I miss Shad for also being the best class rep ever and for being awesome, I miss Maroon 5 for causing a lot of chaos in our class, which is good (bcs takde lah krik krik kelas) and bad at the same time. I miss Hafiz bcs he's the least annoying out of all the guys in class B (lol sorry guys) and he got the potential to be a great physicist one day (TERER GILA PHYSICS I CRY), and Irfan too though he has got to be one of the most annoying person in the world, sorry we caused you a lot of trouble and talk about you behind your back. I''m feeling so guilty now. You actually have a lot of potential to be a better person, so be a better person, try to not get people to hate you, be good, be humble, don't boast about what you're good at. I know you'll be a great person. Last but not least, I miss KMPk. All of it.